Lets just get this straight. You, Birds Eye, sell frozen food. You advertise this food with images that you produce. You employ designers and photographers. You have producers and models. You are a real company.
Frankly, most people would expect that creating a picture of a woman in a kitchen holding a plate of food would be within your competence.
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Friday, November 14, 2008
Birds Eye: Birds Hands
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49 comments:
wow!!! she's one Stepford wife... look at that plate balancing on her hand perfectly!
But...can't you tell from her ethereal glow she's an angel? She probably doesn't even have hands, just beautiful, beautiful wings. And frozen vegetables.
That is the creepiest smile!
It looks like a pedo-smirk, but on a woman!
The original, which is a little bit bigger, is here:
http://kitchengiveaway.birdseye.com/pages/
She can only prepare Bird's Eye ready meals since that accident cleaning the food processor.
I suppose it would be wrong to mention the camel toe as well..?
Both of her arms appear to be stumps, upon which perch a disembodied hand holding a plate of food. And yet she still looks vacantly pleased about all of this.
Their food obviously requires human flesh so the woman there cut her hand off, because fresh corpses are hard to come by today.
WOW, that's creepy! But I guess it's good that they're trying to boost the self-esteem of amputees.
Oh I get it!! She's the T-Rex variety of woman.. HOT!!
Looks like they took a picture of a woman standing with her arms folded across her chest and then edited (badly) her arms.
Weird effect, at any rate...
I would need confidence too if i had to prepare food with mangled hands.
Cook with confidence, indeed. I wouldn't be too confident about that sweater she's wearing, seeing that it looks 3 sizes too small for her.
That facial expression is just... wrong.
Actually, her hands go up into the convex cavity under the plate. The unusually-shaped plate symbolizes the bovine rectum that is the source of the meat in the Birdseye food she's serving - which also explains her facial expression as she imagines serving it to her cheating husband.
KIIIIILLL.... MEEEEE.....
FAIL. She's standing awkwardly and scrunching her hands under the plate that she's holding too close to her body, but there's no way this is a PSD.
Unless you think that the norm is for women to have forarms that are 1/3 the length of their upper arms, then she is definately Shopped. (go ahead and measure - most people's arms are within an inch of equal, from the armpit to the crease of the elbow, and from the elbow crease to the wrist.)
Eww, gross.
This one is a complete fail. Can Bird's Eye not afford anything more than stock photos?
Abysmal. Atrocious. Tragic. Deplorable. Horrid. And I don't like the look of the gravity defying dinner either.
You'd think it wouldn't be hard for Birdseye to find, you know, someone who actually eats their products. They could have even paid someone to hold the plate.
Her right elbow drops below her other elbow by quite a bit. Of course her forearms are all screwed up too. Looking at the larger picture, her head does not seem quite right either.
Okay, I realize they wanted the food to look OMG PERFECT I WANNA EAT THAT, but is it really so hard to take a picture of a woman holding a plate and then photoshop just the food onto that? That way you can avoid looking like, I dunno, you're a handless woman holding balancing a plate of food that happens to have fingers on your stumps? (Although even that wouldn't fix the creepy smile. Is she really THAT happy to be a cripple?)
@ David - no, it isn't wrong to mention the camel toe - I, too, noticed and wondered why, in addition to the other horrific things going on here, they chose to cut her photo just below her weird crotch instead of cutting it out. The darker fabric just draws the eye, even with that satanic expression on her face.
@bareback grrl - Clearly your eyes are 'shopped. Even if you ignore her weird arm disfigurement she isn't standing in the same country as that kitchen.
Lmao if you can scrunch your forearm in half then you're a good one...oh and a freak.
Aside from the poor stump-arm woman, I'm still trying to figure out the geometrical nature of the kitchen in the background. o_O Try to build THAT thing, and you'll probably go crazy o.o
I guess the creator of this image deserves some credit - OK, the hands are not perfect, but you have to admit: turning Tom Hanks into a woman such a credible way - that requires some PS skills...
I'm pretty sure her arms were crossed in the original badly chopped pic. Her left (screen right) arm is too close to her body and the other was cut off at the elbow and the opposite cuff badly cloned and foreshortened.
There's another pic of that creepy woman, where her hands are arranged differently, but equally wrong:
https://www.birdseyefoods.com/inspiration/Default.aspx
Something like that is just lame. This is what happens when I try to shop something together from old photos and pics off the net which don't really fit. I would never try charge money for something that awful...
I also find it amusig that the food does't slide from the plate. Maybe it's glued on or something?
Looking at the slightly larger original is even scarier! (http://kitchengiveaway.birdseye.com/pages/)
Her right forearm has a touch of thalidomide about it and as to what the 'fingers' are supposed to be doing, goodness only knows!
She is definitely Hanks in drag.
The super-bendy wrists and the misplaced, slightly blurry fingers are very creepy. They go right along with her expression.
You try to hold your hands like that with a hot plate on them!
Most people put their hands on the edge where the plate isn't hot.
Sorry, I just realized the creepy fingers are on the larger picture that wash 'shopped differently.
The plate was so heavy it broke her wrists.
it looks like her pelvis area has been 'shopped, too.
all the different perspectives makes me dizzy and her hand is HUGE. ("man hands")
Next to the image on the Birds Eye site they proclaim, "Get the tools that make cooking easier..."
I presume that 'tools' means sinsiter looking lady android with detachable gadget-hands and ever-moist love-crevice. Food-magnets optional.
Not to mention her face looks glued on and crookedly to boot... or rather, a shot of Tom Hanks from when he was in that ill-fated TV show Bosom Buddies and had to dress in drag was comped onto a woman's head... this image is wrong on so many counts.
Ahahaha this is too much!
I'm gonna have nightmares about The STump Lady assaulting me with frozen vegetables tonight, I just know it.
Bird's Eye is a not-so-great name for a food company.
Don't any of you remember Tom Hanks in that TV sitcom Bosum Buddies! He was Yummy. (if you like guys in dresses that is).
wow nice comment...i never thought that before. yup the best photo for the ads is the woman is cooking.
Deden
Success with Women
http://www.sosuav3.blogspot.com
I couldn't get the email to work, but I wanted to share this with you...I found it disturbing to say the least.
http://slightlywarped.com/crapfactory/photoshoptennis/match-1all.htm
Ruth... do you even know what photoshop tennis is? Or the premise? Methinks you obviously don't.
Y'know, what this site needs is something that automatically forwards each entry and comment directly to the investor relations email address for the company responsible for the screwup.
I don't know about you but I never heard of no birdseye
Her hands are weird, and the kitchen, yes. But look at her head! Her head! It's totally big and misplaced!! How creepy.
Has her face been mirrored down the middle?
Hmm, I can't be the 1st one that noticed subliminal messages on her crotch. I guess I am. lol
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