This Internet Sure Is Shiny

Boss: Yeah, great, laverly. Just one thing. Let's have a reflection in the screen.
Designer: Wot?

Original is here. Thanks to Marcio Toledo!

Motorola: You Know Whats Great About Women With Huge Hands?

Remember when Apple was dragged over hot coals for using a well-endowed hand model to make their iPod look smaller? Motorola throws caution to the wind and brazenly scales up their RAZR model's mitts. (As if the image wasn't video-card-packaging bad anyway.)

Much respect to Nadya at Coilhouse.

Snakes On A Plane: Logical Flaw Surfaces

I'm sick of these motorboating snakes on this motorboating plane!

What? I watched it on TBS. Thanks to the 35 people who have sent this to me over the last three weeks.

Groundhog Day: "Special" Is The Operative Word

Tkklhth: Look! Another human artefact!
Rgdgdg: It appears to be a wrapper for an optical disc.
Tkklhth: What can it tell us about this culture?
Rgdgdg: That they were often deformed, with their faces a bit too small for their heads?
Tkklhth: Or perhaps they were crap at Photoshop.

Embiggen. Props to Antony.

Rambo 4: Stallone 0

If you've ever wondered what Pablo Picasso would have done had he had a copy of Photoshop, look no further.

Embiggen here, kind regards to Eric.

Nipplegate: Only In Florida

Thanks to JR for this link on the Florida WWE nipplegate drama. Apparently Florida law prohibits pictures of nipples in public, with the law possibly being taken too literally in this case.

The big winner in blog coverage was sociological images, a clever parody of 1970s feminist windbaggery serious academic explanation of why deleting or showing nipples is either bad or good.

Daily Fail: Violent Vids Upsetting Our Drug-Crazed Designers

My inbox is now buried with submissions of this latest triumph for the Daily Mail and their war on reality. Original is here. Thanks to everyone who sent this in.

The Accidental Husband (part 1)

Suspension of disbelief is the willingness of an audience to invest emotional resources in a story that they know to be false. The main belief to be suspended here is that the designers cared about their work.

1. It would help if you actually looked at the person you were half-heartedly pretending to catch.
2. Monty Python feet.
3. That's a remarkably serene expression, Mr Head Paste.
4. Chrysler building has inexplicably moved to Chelsea. It doesn't even line up with the street grid.
5. We'll let this one go, as it is entirely possible that Colin Firth really does have giant hands.
6. The.
7. Worst.
8. Cutout.
9. Ever.

Thanks to everyone who sent this one in, and yes, I know the other poster is even worse. Stay tuned. Full size here.

Canon: Can't

Quality is just a touch on Command Q away.

Original here. Thanks to Manuel!

Kimora Lee: The Photoshop Of Dorian Gray

As Jezebel points out, So. Much. PhotoShop.

Tip of the hat to Holly B!

Apple: Huge Goof, Jobs, Entire Board To Resign

The reflection clearly* reads Macy Gray.

Thanks to Luciano in Brazil. Original here.
* for low values of 'clearly'

Update: someone at Apple reads photoshopdisasters!

Daily Mail: Don't Do The Brown Acid

Layering mistake? Head injury? Malice? The Daily Mail's rugby coverage takes a psychotropic turn.

Thanks to Nino, original is here.

Scrubs: We Feel Your Pain

Touchstone Pictures is a major unit of The Walt Disney Company, the third largest media organization in the world with revenues exceeding $60 billion.

Evidently very little of that filters down to the Art department, who seem to have assembled this cover largely using the lasso and gradient tools. Do you think those doors would actually meet when they close?

Thanks to Colleen and everyone else who sent this in. Bigger source image is here.

Readers Digest: Maybe It's A VampirePhone

The missing tail in the reflection could be put down to artistic license, but those icons are fair game.

Discussion at Woot! Thanks to Mathew for the tip.

SEAT: Logic Is An Optional Extra

The thrust of this SEAT ad is that it is for design-conscious families. This family doesn't want the regular baby incubator. Oh no. They want something more Philippe Starck. A chap in a white coat dejectedly takes away the rejected incubator.

Which is apparently lighter than air. (Gallic shrug.)

Props to Gaduman. Bigger pics here.

Shimano: Righty Tighty Lefty Loosey

The curious thing about this one is that the reflection isn't a simple copy-and-flip. The perspective is a little different, suggesting a different shot was used. Someone actually made an effort before goofing and rotating the image instead of flipping it.

Thanks to Idenwen.

Hannah Montana: The Really Real Teeth

Sometimes writing this blog is like shooting fish in a barrel, except that instead of barrels it's trillion-dollar media conglomerates and instead of fish it is our confidence in them.

Thanks to Scott.

Fashion Week Daily: Dude, Your Grandmother Is Hot

In any creative endeavor, there has to be a determining process - or metric - by which rationalization can be made. In these terms the creative process is an application of aesthetic ideology onto the matrix of a constantly shifting shared culture. The determination and assessment of quality is a catharsis that constitutes the aaaaargh aaaargh oh my God! No! Keep it away from me! Aaaargh!

Original is here. Thanks to Carina.

Edit: Added emphasis to hat fiasco.

Street Kings: Trigger Debate Rages On

Congressional Republicans today stepped up pressure on House Street Kings Leader Keanu Reeves (D-Zion) to justify his "no triggers" policy.

Thanks to Gant for digging this one up.

Stuck On You: Not So Much

Now I need you to adapt some artwork for this movie. It's about two guys who are joined together - and this is important - cannot be separated. The whole point of the movie is that they can't be separated. Do you get it? Great. Go right ahead, I have total confidence in you.

Thanks to Kris.

Blackhawk Down: The Hostages Are Being Held In SimCity

Let's hope we can rescue them before the budget runs out! Aargh my industrial zone is on fire again!

Thanks to Alain-James for the tip.

Street Kings: Surprisingly Safety Conscious

Their city. Their rules. Rule 217: Please keep your finger off the trigger of your gun.


Sorry for the watermarks, but some dickless wonder has been cloning this site.

Thanks to Linek!

Germany <3 PhotoshopDisasters

MOM! LOOK!

Thanks to Felix R.

GQ: She Probably Stopped Smiling When She Saw The Newsstand

OMG dude look as Rachel Bilson's legs they're uhhh like totally whoa. Yeahhhh! (sound of smoke being inhaled). Whoa! she's like uhhh some sort of sideshow. You know what would be (more smoke-related noises) totally amazing: we should uhhhh put like an inexplicably fake umm shadow behind her, so she's like a warp-legged captain of a rubber sheet. Whoa! Yo Art Director didn't we order a pizza?

Thanks to Maggie Stix and GoFugYourself

Spiderman 2: Mary Jane Is Mister Fantastic

Either Kirsten Dunst's right left arm is five feet long and has two elbows, or someone, somewhere, figured no one would notice. We are that no one!

Thanks again to Ken Justice.

Hanes: Look Who We Got Our Clipping Path On Now

If you're trying to guess which one is the real leg, the smart money is on neither.

Thanks to Julia.

More Evidence Of Massive Conspiracy Against Diane Keaton

Diane Keaton can't catch a break these days. Not only is she haphazardly comped with Mandy Moore - just where is she looking? - her mouth has been hacked into the kind of grin that clown morticians might favor.

Also, does Diane Keaton really have only three fingers on her right hand?

Thanks to Ken Justice.

Basic Head Swap

For reasons that probably only make sense to Koreans, Korean posters for Basic Instinct 2 required a head swap for Sharon Stone, so that she had wet hair.

Unfortunately the retouching budget didn't stretch to updating the dry hair in the mirrors behind her.

Diario Sportivo AS: I Wasn't Expecting The Spanish Inquisition

Our chief weapon is Photoshop... and cloning... cloning and Photoshop. Photoshop and cloning. Our two weapons are Photoshop and cloning... and copying and pasting. Argh. Amongst our weaponry are such elements as Photoshop, cloning, copying, pasting. I'll come in again.

Comfy chair to Consultor Anonimo.

Out Magazine: Hey Mr DJ Put A Record On I'm Microcephalic

It looks great, yeah great. You know, one little thing. No big deal. But if you could make the top of her head smaller? Just the top part? So it isn't hiding the banner. Yeah, no, I know, but you know what, no one cares about the top of her head. Just make it smaller. Yes, I know. Just make it smaller. Just do it. I'm just going to go ahead and make that an order. If you could do that, that would be great.

Oh, and if you could make her shoulder disappear, that would also be great.

Bebe: Eva Longoria Is Made Of Rubber

Bebe turns to its inner thirteen year-old for Eva Longoria. Not only is she made of rubber, her suit casts a shadow, as if it were flapping around.

Found at the excellent dlisted.

Jimmy Carr: The Jocelyn Wildenstein of Retouching

Looks like someone's been tweaked a little. What does Mr Carr look like in real life?

Okay. You did you know that the airbrush tool has a flow setting, didn't you?

Thanks to PJ Holden for the tip!

Imagine Babies: What's a watermark?

Images from iStockPhoto: $12
Stealing the preview images instead: $0
Seeing the watermark on your finished, printed artwork: priceless

Batman Fascinated By Window Frame

Not only is Batman choosing a rather odd position to brood from, the floor is, well, phoned in. The reflections would be correct only if the floor were below the buildings opposite.

Thanks to Shortee for this one.

Edit: Delightful discussion on Reddit

Diane "Scarecrow" Keaton

Designer: We don't have a full shot of Diane Keaton?
Art Director: Don't worry! She old!
Designer: So I can just make any bizarre body shape and it will be OK?
Art Director: Who care! She old!
Designer: Look! Her head is like 200% too big! And where is her waist?
Art Director: Hello? Are you still working on that?

Castles In The Air

Sir Lancelot gazed fondly into the soft blue pools of Lady Guineviere's eyes and gently held her mutant third hand. Wait, what?

Courtesy the beautiful Judge A Book By Its Cover.

Heartbreakers: Art breakers

Looks like someone isn't very good at hands! Or heads!

Edit: For those of you who like less terseness, here's the blow-by-blow!

1. Surely statuesque Sigourney would have a head on top of her neck, rather than next to it.
2. Ewww! Web hands!
3. This is just awful. It's as if the designer, exhausted from airbrushing the fake arm in had no idea how to end it and just gave up.
4. What's with the huge hand?

I would have put in #5 Sigourney's blurred-out shoulder, but the other blunders kind of crowded it out. Sorry for the small size; this is the largest image I could find.

Highlander: There can be only wtf

Even if they had remembered to actually put the sword in his hand, this would still win the category for overwhelming homoerotic symbollism.

Props to Jeroen for this one.

Martha Stewart Living: That's one patient dog

Dog looks a little uh, pasted in? Not so much? Perhaps the absence of any doggy footprints is a clue?

Props to the super Photoshop Girl.

Sports Illustrated: Head Shot!

I hear there's a new job opening at Sports Illustrated.

Over Her Impossibly Retouched Body

Besides Eva Longoria's gravity-defying, anatomically incorrect disaster of a pose, there are so many other things wrong with this image that it is simply impossible to know where to begin.

This would be ropey enough on Something Awful, but people actually got paid for this.

Courtesy Coral San.

Maxim: Crack Is Wack

OK, this is a little old (2003), but still quite stunning. Either Michelle Branch has no butt crack, or someone decided that this would pass muster. I mean, it isn't as if Maxim readers would have any particular interest in that part of her anatomy, is it?

Courtesy Darren Barefoot.

Edit: For the sake of the unbelievers, it turns out that that issue of Maxim uses the same image inside the magazine, without the crackectomy.

Blender: We Aren't Even Pretending To Make An Effort Anymore

Blender has set a new standard in committee-think with their composite Britney cover.

Not only do they put the poor tart's head on an uncredited model's body (which is probably, sadly, in her portfolio), they puss out by flagging the image as a composite. To pile insult upon injury, the tragic and desperate use of the word 'truthiness' is an exercise in pathos.

As if this wasn't enough pussing out, the composition suggests that hitting rock bottom means smoking cigarettes and drinking diet Red Bull. Hello? It's Brit-ney Spe-ars.

Thanks to Idolater.

Jordache: Attack Of The Pod People

Even allowing for the culturally-ravaged, post-wardrobe-malfunction neo-fundamentalist, sexual dystopia we live in, the decision of Jordache to Photoshopically amputate Heidi Klum's nipples is a profoundly bizarre one.

What were the possible logical processes that made this happen? Did they think no-one would notice? How could this make any sense? Unbelievable.

Via Gawker.

FHM: Yakuza Babes

At 4am somewhere a designer wakes up and utters "Oh God I forgot to put her finger back in."

Courtesy the always excellent New Shelton Wet/Dry.

Ann Coulter Is An Alien

Courtesy Gawker.

Playboy: Clone Tool Beats Belly Button

Brazilian Playboy readers were shocked to find that its images are manipulated. Shocked!

Courtesy DigitalFreak.